Failure: A reason to get back up

     

Thomas Edison once said that he failed his way to success. Some days I feel like this relates to me. Some days I feel like I wake up fail, the next week I wake up everyday and fail some more and a month later look back and think of all of the failures then realize how far I have come. Failing is not the end but the beginning of any new journey. Your life begins at the end of your comfort zone, so let the uncomfortable moments begin.

      My father has quoted a poem many times throughout my life and it seems fitting to share now. When life has thrown me more than I can bare this poem stands out in my mind and reminds me I can stay down or get up and win the race.

The Race- D.H Groberg

"Quit!" “Give up, you’re beaten!” they shout at me and plead,
"There’s just too much against you now, this time you can’t succeed.”
And as I started to hang my head in front of failure’s face,
My downward fall is broken by the memory of a race.
And hope refills my weakened will as I recall that scene.
For just the thought of that short race rejuvenates my being.

A children’s race, young boys, young men; how I remember well,
    excitement sure, but also fear, it wasn’t hard to tell.
They all lined up so full of hope, each thought to win that race
    or tie for first, or if not that, at least take second place.
Their parents watched from off the side, each cheering for their son,
    and each boy hoped to show his folks that he would be the one.
 The whistle blew and off they flew, like chariots of fire,
    to win, to be the hero there, was each young boy’s desire.
One boy in particular, whose dad was in the crowd,
    was running in the lead and thought “My dad will be so proud.”

But as he sped down the field and crossed a shallow dip,
    the little boy who thought he’d win, lost his step and slipped.
Trying hard to catch himself, his arms flew everyplace,
    and midst the laughter of the crowd he fell flat on his face.
As he fell, his hope fell too; he couldn’t win it now.
    Humiliated, he just wished to disappear somehow.
But as he fell his dad stood up and showed his anxious face,
    which to the boy so clearly said, “Get up and win that race!”

He quickly rose, no damage done, behind a bit that’s all,
    and ran with all his mind and might to make up for his fall.
So anxious to restore himself, to catch up and to win,
    his mind went faster than his legs. He slipped and fell again.
He wished that he had quit before with only one disgrace.
    “I’m hopeless as a runner now, I shouldn’t try to race.”
But through the laughing crowd he searched and found his father’s face
    with a steady look that said again, “Get up and win that race!”

So he jumped up to try again, ten yards behind the last.
    “If I’m to gain those yards,” he thought, “I’ve got to run real fast!”
Exceeding everything he had, he regained eight, then ten...
    but trying hard to catch the lead, he slipped and fell again.
Defeat! He lay there silently. A tear dropped from his eye.
    “There’s no sense running anymore! Three strikes I’m out! Why try?
I’ve lost, so what’s the use?” he thought. “I’ll live with my disgrace.”
    But then he thought about his dad, who soon he’d have to face.

“Get up,” an echo sounded low, “you haven’t lost at all,
    for all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.
Get up!” the echo urged him on, “Get up and take your place!
    You were not meant for failure here! Get up and win that race!”
So, up he rose to run once more, refusing to forfeit,
    and he resolved that win or lose, at least he wouldn’t quit.
So far behind the others now, the most he’d ever been,
    still he gave it all he had and ran like he could win.
Three times he’d fallen stumbling, three times he rose again.
    Too far behind to hope to win, he still ran to the end.

They cheered another boy who crossed the line and won first place,
    head high and proud and happy -- no falling, no disgrace.
But, when the fallen youngster crossed the line, in last place,
    the crowd gave him a greater cheer for finishing the race.
And even though he came in last with head bowed low, unproud,
    you would have thought he’d won the race, to listen to the crowd.
And to his dad he sadly said, “I didn’t do so well.”
    “To me, you won,” his father said. “You rose each time you fell.”

And now when things seem dark and bleak and difficult to face,
    the memory of that little boy helps me in my own race.
For all of life is like that race, with ups and downs and all.
    And all you have to do to win is rise each time you fall.
And when depression and despair shout loudly in my face,
    another voice within me says, “Get up and win that race!”


    So get up my friends and push forward. Some days the light is small at the end of what seems to be a never ending tunnel but step by step the path will get easier, the path will get brighter and some day there will be a much clearer understanding of why life handed us the cards we were dealt. Be brave and courageous and rise each time you fall. You never know what is around the next corner of life but you will never know if you do not keep moving forward.

Intuitive Living for the Mind, Body and Soul

     Have you ever taken a moment to think about how amazing your body is? Take this question seriously for a second because I have a sneaking suspicion somewhere during your day you looked into the mirror and found fault with the amazing body that stands before you and it is high time we started to give credit where credit is due. The capabilities of this body even in its most basic state are a miracle and I do not say that lightly. Your body has over 200 Trillion cells and it is estimated that your body produces over 400 Billion chemical reactions per second, that is a lot of reactions. On top of all of that it took thousands of years to create you! Each of us was created from generations of ancestors who through love, devotion, trial and tears came together to create the priceless creation that is starring back at you in the mirror.

     Have you taken some time today to appreciate and admire the person starring back at you in the mirror? Sometimes we become disconnected with that person so don't worry if you don't see all of the great things immediately, I didn't either. If you take some time to look a little harder you will see someone who is truly unique and spectacular. We are each one of a kind and there will never be anyone identical so why would we expect a one size fits all method to work for our daily living?  This is what intuitive living is all about. It accounts for the fact that each of us are different and need different things. Intuitive living is not just for how we relate to food and our bodies but how we relate to life.

  For a long time people have focused on outside sources to help them achieve their health, wealth, relationships and personal sanity. Living a great life takes more than following a set pattern of rules established by an outside source, it takes listening to yourself and responding to those signals. You were born with the ability to know exactly what you need in order to become great but a large majority of people these days have stopped listening and many are paying the price. Society is looking outward for the next best thing, the thing that will change them and bring them back to being whole. The answers to this does not come from an outside source but it does come from within.

   Listening to your intuitive cues means living at the core of your being. It is being perceptive and reactive to your needs. But how do you start on the path to intuitive living? You start by becoming self aware. Next time you eat start to notice when you become full or if you are still hungry. If you are with a friend or spouse start recognizing how you feel within the context of the relationship. Start to be aware of how your life is playing out. Do you feel at one with your decisions? When do you start to get tired? Do you feel like you have a connection with your higher power and is that something that brings you greater fulfillment? Start asking yourself questions, getting to know what drives you and what sucks the energy from your life. Feel what it is like to be in your body and start asking why you are doing what you are doing. Becoming conscious of your thoughts, feelings and actions is the first step in self discovery and a key component in living an intuitive lifestyle.

   When you start to realize what you do and why you do it you start to recognize what is working and what is not. You become more aware of what is going on in your body and can give it what it needs. You start to recognize what relationships are healthy and which ones are not. There is not a one size fits all method. We all have to start somewhere but before we start looking for the next diet, spiritual methodology or self help book perhaps we should consult the person who knows us best and that person should be YOU. If you are not that person then it is time to start rediscovering and awakening the divine soul within you. It is time to start to living an intuitive life.






 

Resolution Revamp: Taking Action and Grateful Reflection

     

Resolution Revamp: Part 3 & 4 Taking Action & Grateful Reflection

    So you have taken some time to take a second look at your resolutions/goals and figured out what you really want out of life. You have created declarations that speak to your soul and have felt a renewed sense of connection that your previous resolutions did not bring. Your goals no longer are focused on losing things in life but rather gaining better prospectives, habits, relationships etc. At this point you must take action. Just by starting something you create the momentum that begins to propel things into existence. Be on the look out for more opportunities to reach your goals. When you focus on gain centered goals you will find many other opportunities to achieve your goals.

  For your Declarations:  Read them out loud everyday like you mean it. Put them in your car and when your alone shout it out at the top of your lungs, look yourself in the mirror, connect and make yourself believe them. Read it, say it and write it like you mean it. It may seem silly at first but trust me, you will start to not only have a whole new relationship with yourself but you will start to find new and wonderful things coming into your life. If for some reason you just cannot muster up the courage to shout your declaration from the rooftops fear not, there is still plenty of room for the shy and reserved. Figure out what works best for you. Some people express themselves best through pen and paper, write out your goals and declarations or meditate upon them and start visualizing them happening in your life. Whatever you do get them in your head. If you cannot do it everyday do it as much as you can. This is not about perfection it is about consistency and picking things up where you left off. Whatever you do start to embody your declarations.

 One of the best parts about this process is it allows you to add things to your declarations. It creates room in your life for change and advancement. Somedays you might decide you need to change the statement a bit. Maybe you need a little more compassion in your life, maybe you need to hear that your creator knows who you are or maybe you need to hear that you are loved unconditionally. You can add these in or take things away at any point during the year and you can always pick up where you left off. Transformative growth doesn't stop just because you got busy. You can hop back on the train and adjust your perception whenever you like. The biggest thing with these is to keep them in your mind so you consciously think about them every day. You will be amazed to see the small things you start to do just because you have something at the forefront of your mind.

For Your Goals: Start implementing your goals into your life. You now have a few different ways to start achieving them and will probably find more along the way. Everyday look for ways to incorporate these goals into your life. Sometimes you might come to points where you may feel discouraged or like you just are not getting what you had hoped out of the goals. Take time to look at your goals again, what are you really looking for. Reassess and reapply the principles of Declarative Goal setting. We are continuously changing and growing and our goals should aim us towards where we want to go. Transformation is not something that happens overnight and it is not a one size fits all process and sometimes our goals may need some adjusting. This is progressive goal setting and just because you have to reroute does not mean the goal is unrealized.

The Last Step: Grateful Reflection

     You will start to recognize new opportunities coming your way and will find yourself doing things in line with your Declarative Goals. You will find yourself seeing things that are not lining up with your intentions and substituting them for new positive things. Part of this process is recognizing your growth and recognizing those who have helped you achieve it. Write down what is happening, share it with a friend or just acknowledge you are moving forward. Recognize those who have helped you out, give yourself credit for what you are doing right, and write down the experiences that are changing your life.  At the end of the year you can take a look at the journey you went on and realize progress was made. You are a transformative soul and can do transformative things.

New Year

   I promise if you continue to keep your goals and declarations at the forefront of your mind your life will change. Come the end of next year instead of realizing all of the things you did not accomplish you will look at how you embodied your declarations and how your life has changed. You will recognize how you gained a better relationship with yourself and others. You will realize how your words have created actions that changed your life. You will see a change and you will have not just resolved to change but you will have become the change you wanted to see. Through doing your goals like this you will start to see lasting change. We want to live lives full of purpose, passion and transformation with the key word being full. So open up your life and start to fill your life with wonderful things. Then at the end of the year you can truly say you have gained something wonderful!

Resolution Revamp Part II: Putting the Declare in Declarative Goals

Making Your Declaration

Step 2: Making Your Declaration

    So hopefully some of you have taken the time to transform your New Years Resolution into a Gain Centered Goals. If not Click on the link and it will take you to the first part of the goal series so you can start there. Declarative goals are transformative goals that lead you to your core inner desires. Declarative goals are in line with living life to its fullest potential and pushing out the superficial goals that typically put people in a place of disempowerment. Declarative Goals allow you to progress and embody what you really want your life. You will gain your life and be more fulfilled in the process rather than losing, quitting or getting rid of something. Declarative goals allow for transformation and that is what life is all about. Part of the transformation happens when we apply Declarations to our goals. They help us embody positive change and be active creators in our own lives.

     Using declarations helps to make things manifest in our lives and is a statement that directs your life to where you would like to go. Instead of your stray thoughts deciding what is coming your way, this is you telling the world directly what is coming and what you are going to do. This declaration not only helps you to stay focused on the creation of what you want but it also sets you up for success by: making you aware of the opportunities around you, it identifies things that will help you achieve your desires, helps you to prioritize, and keeps you aware of what is working and what is not. This declaration is you telling the universe you are ready to play ball and you are playing with your eyes wide open.

How to make a declaration:

1.  Take the list of goals you have made and look at what strengths you need to achieve them. Look at what obstacles might get in your way, think of what you need in your life to make this happen. Do you need people or support to help you reach your goals? Take all of these things and write them down.

2.  View the examples below to give yourself a good idea of what the declarations will end up looking like and then start to write your own empowering declarations. Here are a couple keys to making sure your declarations are going in the right direction.

         A. Your Declarations need to be in present tense. Great things are happening to you                      right now.

         B. Make sure the statement resonates with you deeply. Be empowering, you might write               things you do not believe are true today but they are the desires of your heart. Write                 this statement as if nothing could stop you. Write down things that move and inspire                 your spirit to wake up and pay attention.

      

Declaration Examples- 

 " I Declare that I am living a life of health, happiness and strength. My life is full of restorative healing, love and forgiveness. My thoughts of positivity are transforming my whole being and any negative beliefs I held onto. I live life with purpose and passion everyday. My body and life allow me to move freely, effortlessly and enthusiastically towards my goals. Each day opportunities are making themselves known and bringing me new and exciting ways to empower my life."

 " I Declare that I am worthy of love and acceptance. The magnitude of love contained within my relationships exceeds my expectations daily.  I am able to rely on those around me as they are able to rely on me. I am blessed with more than enough and love abounds in my home. The people I am surrounded with help me to become a better person. I am full of love and compassion and seek daily to share the gratefulness of my heart.  I abound in love, rejoice in love and am perfected in the love of the Creator and those surrounding my life."

"I Declare that I am enough. I am unbound by the unlimited potential within me. I am a creator who builds people up and will not be defined by my limitations. I am capable of great things and continue to arise and powerfully overcome challenges daily. When challenges arise, I am able to quickly overcome challenges with innovative ideas and swift action."

"I Declare abundance on my life. There world is pouring its abundance on me and new streams of income are bursting forth to meet this decree. I am able to navigate the financial waters of life with ease and agility. New positive opportunities are being created daily to bring me growth and prosperity."

3. Now that you have a bit of direction take flight. Start the writing process and you will soon discover that once you start writing these and saying them out loud you will feel elated and lifted up. Your mind will be lifted to a place of possibility and each new declaration will start flowing from your finger tips.

Finish Step 2's Declarations and be on the look out for Step Three: Taking Action 

Resolution Revamp - Creating Goals that Last

For those whose New Years Resolutions included the words: Stop, Quit, Lose, Cut or Get Rid

   Take a step back from those New Years Resolutions and pause for just a moment. I know many of you have probably spent the last week or month contemplating what your New Years Resolutions are going to be and probably pin pointed the exact process of how you are going to achieve them. I am sure for the last few days you have stayed the course and are feeling optimistic but is your resolution really focused on what your looking to change? Is your resolution causing you to to look at yourself as a project instead of a whole person?

    Many people are setting goals that do not create lasting change because they are focused on the wrong thing. For many the resolution process starts with the realization that last years resolution was not achieved, followed by moments of personal berating and then a firm resolve to do it all over again to prove their will power does exist. Many of these failed resolutions start off  including the words lose, stop, fit, quit, cut or get rid of and often times are cover ups for what we really want. The result is the creation of a resolution that reminds us we didn't add up last year, are not yet good enough this year and on the off chance the goal is met, that we were once something less than extraordinary. Does this sound familiar?

 In a research study done in 2007 by Richard Wiseman from the University of Britol they found of  3,000 participants who set New Years Resolutions 88% failed to achieve them. That is 2,340 people who concluded the year by realizing they failed,  beat themselves up and then resolved to do better the next year by basing their new New Years Resolution on what they did not accomplish the last year. There is a problem with this whole New Years Resolution business and I think it is time for a change.

   Much of the problem lays in the way we create our goals and the self talk that goes along with them. What we say affects what we do and what we do effects the way we live. Our language and self talk will put us on a course to find success or dwindle in defeat, the choice is ours. Wouldn't it be wise to start the year off empowering ourselves rather than beating ourselves down with self defeating talk? Our goals should be about what we want to add to our lives, our live through this become more fulfilled and create more positive opportunities for change. Focusing on what we want to lose and cut from our lives is bound to leave a void and leave us with less than what we started with.

    So this year instead of creating resolutions focused on limitations lets look for a way to empower ourselves to create lasting change. Lets look for a way to embody our goals while allowing continuous appreciation and progression of the person as a whole rather than reducing ourselves to insufficient parts. Let me introduce to you the Declarative Goal Series! Over the next week I will be introducing one of the four parts of the declarative goal process. Each part can stand on its own as a trans-formative tool to help you reach your goal but added together they create a powerful combination.

 A Declarative Goal is broken down into four main parts Gain Centered Goal Setting, Declaration, Action and Grateful Reflection. this post will be focused on creating Gain Centered Goals.

Gain Centered Goals

   Gain Centered Goals allow for the creation of goals focused on what our lives will gain by hitting goals rather than what is lost. The focus is not on the loss of a habit/thing but rather what is gained by the loss of the habit/thing. For example if  your resolution was to stop smoking you would ask yourself why you wanting to quit smoking. The reason why you want to quit smoking is your Gain Centered Goal. This not only cuts to the core of why you are doing something but it also opens up other avenues to achieve the same goal rather than just focusing on one thing. When people start seeing success in their lives they feel more invested and further commit to their success. So allowing more than one way to meet goals ultimately increases the chances of success. Below is another example of how to change your current Loss Centered Goals into Gain Centered Goals.

Example Goal: 

The Loss- Lose weight and fit into smaller size
Now ask why you want to lose weight and fit into a smaller size
The Gain- I would like to have more self confidence & feel comfortable in my own skin.
The answer you gave above is now your new goal. 

Now that you have established your Gain Centered Goals ask yourself what avenues could you take to achieve it. You should be able to come up with multiple ways to achieve your goal now that you are focusing on the gain.

How to accomplish this goal: Lose weight  (not what we are looking for, remember we are focusing on things to gain in life not things to lose), become more active, look for clothes that are good for my body type, start appreciating how I look today, participate in events that boost my self confidence and cultivate new talents, eat foods that make me feel good and not sluggish, listen to my body, stop eating in front of the television  --- rephrase into a "Gain" statement ---> Create an environment where I can eat and focus on my bodies needs.

Implementation: Now you can get started on actively pursuing and achieving your goals. The great thing about this is you have options. If some days you are not feeling like focusing on one way to accomplish your goal look for a different way to achieve it. Now that there is not the focus on losing losing something in our lives, we are creating lives full of great things that better our lives. By the end of the year you may not have lost something but you have gained what you were really looking for.

    Our lives are more than being attached to a number or the idea that we are less than a great because of a habit. Our lives and goals should be aimed towards the fulfillment of ourselves as whole person rather than the individual sum of parts. We are looking for fulfillment in our lives, connection, relationships, self identification and satisfaction. If we stop looking for fulfillment in the loses of life we will gain new perspective that allow us to thrive instead of diminish. So take some time and revamp those goals focused on loss and look for what is to be gained.